Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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