pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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