operation have a gay friend backfired
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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