so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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