On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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