Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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