guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize