Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
