i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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