I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
