He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
How does one acquire holy water?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
