She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize