Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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