dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
