i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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