Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
