So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize