Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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