omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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