Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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