this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Randomize