the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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