saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I see more hoeing in ur future
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