The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
