Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
