btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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