i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
