Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize