Do you still have your period?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
