What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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