The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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