the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
