i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Boobs speak an international language.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
