Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
