"it" just moved
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
