And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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