people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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