I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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