check it out our google latitudes are spooning
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
