lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
