Im at strip club and am horny
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
