We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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