I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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