the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
