In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Just pee around me
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
