You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
