hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
