She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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