U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
