When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
