Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
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