I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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